I've been bit by the Love Bug!

It's been a while since I last wrote, but that's because 8 weeks and 2 days ago I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy. Pierre D. Brown III was born 8 lbs, 1 oz and 20 inches after 9 hours of labor... You can call him Tripp, but he is my Lovebug. Motherhood has changed me in several ways. One can never 'totally' be prepared for the impact of having a newborn baby to care for; it's an AMAZING experience. I thank God for the shock of "you are pregnant" back in February. Those words changed my life forever!

 It's truly a sacrifice, but when your heart and mind are all aligned with God's will and trust in His promise, it's very 'easy' to lose self for the well-being of such a precious gift. Our "Sun" has given us so much life! From his first week home fussing and getting adjusted to his new, large, cold world to his random, BIG chuckles of laughter and loooooong conversations on serious issues of today, he has tons of personality and is certainly an advanced little guy.

During this time I have prayed more than I have ever prayed in my life because the thought that I will not be able to protect him from the all of the crazies of the world, the hurt that has come to us all at some point, and the rejection he might experience just because of who is overwhelms me. I have to remind myself that God IS good, and He has already gone before him to provide provision, favor, grace, and mercy over his life. My son is destined for greatness, he is the best of his parents, and MORE isn't big enough for the life God has planned for Him in the Kingdom.


Lovebug enjoys lots of conversation, looking at lights and still fans, and he can eat! I love to feel him squeeze my pinkie with his tiny hand, or make his sweet baby "coo" after a long yawn. While sleeping, he laughs so hard. I can feel his laughter in his tummy as he plays with God's angels. The kid is hilarious. His facial expressions are priceless! Man, this is the MOST amazing experience I have ever had... I feel like I have a greater purpose, now more than ever. Our Lovebug gives me life!!

I thank God for trusting us with His son, and I hold on to my faith knowing that He will help us get it right... Maybe not perfect, but I want to be that parent of excellence providing our son with a balanced childhood, stability, discipline, and opportunity beyond what's considered normal and possible. He will know and BELIEVE that with God, all things are POSSIBLE! This has been and will continue to be one of the greatest challenges of my life... But nervous, excited, anxious, and prayerful I am up for the challenge. He makes me feel like SUPER woman, and I will do my best to soar beyond the sky for him.

Hopefully, you have the pleasure of meeting him some day because he is truly a blessing. Thank you for continued prayers of guidance, the spirit of                     discernment, and clear direction throughout the journey of parenthood.

Started from the Bottom... You got this!

"You placed the stars in the sky, and you know them by name. You are amazing God! You've seen the depths of my heart, and you love me the same. You are amazing God!" -Kierra Sheard

Wow! God is too good, and so AMAZING!! Tomorrow will mark the first day of the 8th year in my teaching career... Ha! Couldn't have paid me to say after those first trying-slapping-kicking-rolling three or four years I'd still be "Making a Difference". I remember thinking/saying/crying this isn't 'school', this can't be what You [God] called me to do, these people [adults] are crazy... HELP!! Because today I know the meaning of patience, the growth of my mind, and the strength & compassion of my heart, it was ALL NECESSARY for my tomorrow. I know it's were I have to be, for now, because there are people that need to know me, lives that I have been called to impact & change, individuals that will help me grow, and students that will change somethings, and be great all because of  'little ole me'. I'm enjoying where I teach and coach now, even with the challenges that have and will come at the CCHS too, it's been a pleasant journey thus far.

But guess what? Tomorrow is not only the first day of my eighth teaching year, it's the first day of the school year that I will become a mother to an amazing little boy, Pierre D. Brown III, my Love Bug. Yeap, I will be a mommie! Yeap, those prayers are welcomed! Yeap, it's almost time! Yeap, ish just got real! I know I've been prepared for this... Not just motherhood, but my life as a woman of her 30s. Those 20s were literally "Off The Chain"! In the last year, better late than never, I've learned to let go of small stuff, and as big as your situation may seem today, it's small. I've learned to accept people for who they are, how they are, where they are, because someone decided to accept me... Perfectly imperfect! Be you, work toward being the best you, but nonetheless, be YOU! I've learned that my tone does matter, my words should be limited, and there isn't anything wrong with the truth, tactfully. Oh, yea, everyone doesn't need or want my opinion.

My marriage has benefited from my growth as well. [P, you can chime in if you need to...?] Throughout our 2 plus years I am intentionally learning to serve, and minimize self. Grown people understand what I'm saying! It's a daily process, but one I'm embracing. If I'm serving him and he his serving me, nobody is lacking. He has been an amazing support system throughout my pregnancy, and I can't think of another man I'd rather be sharing this experience with. We laugh often, have random heart-to-hearts, and maintain our friendship, which keeps our marriage fresh. I am crazy... He knows this, he makes the adjustment, checks me when necessary, and we keep it together! God is smiling on our lives... I'm grateful.

Note from Cren to wife & mother Mrs. Brown:
Your life will never be the same once our baby boy gets here. Whew! Expose him to the world beyond what the world attempts to offer. Be a consistent example of God's love, allow him to ask questions, feed his imagination, embrace his mistakes, and remember you will make some too. Don't be too hard on yourself! Keep the core of you solid, baby will make you change those super tough parts without you even noticing. Keep your husband first, yes, even before baby... That's God's design! Don't neglect yourself while serving Pierre 2 and 3, that may lead to regret later, so remember to make time for yourself. Don't take yourself too serious, and pray before, through, and after those tough moments. You got this... You've been prepared for this... You were made for this! It's your time, welcome your new season with a smile. :-) When you feel like losing control, just 'pop-lock-n-drop it' on your knees in prayer... And keep on pushing!

Thank you Lord for your plan. I haven't always followed your lead, done the unselfish thing, or listened to your quiet voice in my head, but you STILL... and for that I am so very thankful and grateful. You are amazing God! I am what I am, I have what I have, and my life is what it is ALL because of you God... not a grain because of me. I started from the bottom, and I am on my way to the top... where ever that is! I'm certain it will blow my mind... Join me there! Amen.

Conversations of the Heart... Who is speaking?

"Success is clarity of my intention... and reaching that intention while being true to myself and with joy." -India Arie

As I sit around and reflect upon different spaces and times in my life, someone was always speaking... Was it me? God? The enemy? Amazingly, based on the fruit of each level or season I can see boldly see who was speaking each time. Some conversations deeper, more intense, overwhelming, and mirror images of me... Others were soft, and quiet, yet compelling. Today my conversations are of excitement, joy, hope, some wonder, and anxiety all at the same time. All conversations of a bold transparency, empowering, and freedom! As my son grows inside of me, I reflect on the conversations I've had with someone else's daughter or son. Who was speaking through me during those times? Did I leave an honest message of love, a genuine me? I can recall times of aggression, but a real, transparent concern of well being and guidance.

Conversations with friends, loved ones, strangers in passing... Who's speaking? I haven't always been completly transparent, but in the past 2 years I have been so real about who I am... my honest intentions. The maturity of letting situations go, no longer embarrassing that conversation or memory. The humility to accept my wrong, and mend a broken bridge. The compassion and grace to forgive another's wrong, and build again....  God heals me! There is a process sometimes that only involves you... Conversations between you and God. An internal beating that's so necessary, yet we are forced to go through it alone, inside of ourselves. It's a constant reminder, a push, a slap, a picture, a song, a phrase.... Break through you! Listen, stop talking. Feel, experience, decide, move ahead.

When we do the common thing, where's the motivation? In most cases the easy thing isn't normally the best or right thing. It's common conversations that guide us to conform to what's expected, not whats necessary. Today my conversations are necessary, intentional reflections of a genuine me. Not necessarily perfect or needed, but honest, from love, and sometimes with a quiet push from God. Although perception is reality to most, the intentions behind the perception speaks volume, and that conclusion comes from who is speaking to you during the conversation you had while making a certain decision... There lies the true reality.

With this miracle inside of me, my conversations may be his reality, which ultimately is to reach the intentions of God for me....

2013... The year of 30! Part II

Each year I declare certain things over my life and the lives of those that I love. Mostly blessings, unprecedented favor, second-second chances, enlarged territory, peace, financial breakthroughs, health, etc. I am very specific in those prayers most times, but this year I ask/told God that all impossibilities would be possible! Obviously, He agreed!

If you were to ask me, "I'm not having kids any time soon" would be my reply... Well, He had another plan! At first in shock, scared, in disbelief, and unsure of myself I found out I would be a mother. REALLY? Today I am a healthy, happy, excited, expecting mommie-to-be of a beautiful & healthy baby boy. To hear his heart beating with such strength, to see his legs kick, and his arms move it's like no other experience in this world... I've never felt this way about anything or anyone in my life. How dare people say God isn't real... He is SO real that He can create another human being inside of little ole me.

Part I was about the enemy attempting to do his job... Break a dream, destroy a vision, and alter the plan... NEGATIVE! Not only did it not work, but God used it for my good! I said in Part I it purposed a thrusting to a new thing, a greater blessing, a new level, and HERE I AM.. When troubles come and people try to discount or attack the will of God, there is a lesson, a greater blessing, and another level in that dimension. However, we can't be successful at the next level until we master our current place, which is why we have these experiences that, at the time, seem to shake our foundation. Fact is when you belong to God and have a true relationship, we may bend, but we never break! It's only April, and 30 has already blown my mind... No matter where you are, whatever your greatest fear, your most certain plan, or your biggest giant... God is still in control! Pray for those that attempt to attack your character, slight your name, or alter God's plan. They need those prayers and regardless of what they say or do you belong to God. Stay in His will & do your BEST... He will handle the rest. Be encouraged today that it all will/is working together for your good. I didn't know that 30 had parenting in the mist, but I'm looking forward to the journey... Son, mommie and daddy loves you.

2013, the year of 30! Part I

I started the year off sleep, resting peacefully in bed. I missed the count down too! I sowed, prayed, and spoke POSSIBLE impossibilities over 2013... For my husband, my family, and my friends. I was eating healthy, hitting the gym regularly, working hard officiating, and planning my birthday party. I was excited and looking forward to celebrating 30. Unfortunately, I neglected to consider the work of the enemy to TRY to cancel out those amazing blessings. Sir devil, I just need to remind you... You or the vessels you attempt to use have no territory and cover no ground in my life, or the lives of those that I love. Kick rocks in flip flops!! I belong to God, everything I touch will prosper, and the best is yet to come, so be mad... It's already done and you can't touch it! Even in doing the things God has called me to do, fulfilling the dreams He has placed in my heart, I have met the challenge of people wanting/trying/working to alter that dream, but what is really taking place is a thrusting... A spiritual propelling that is happening in the natural. I'm being pushed to my next thing, a new level, a greater dimension where God will use the enemy to place me higher. So, keep up the good work... It's working for my good!